A hot mess of the genderless nature of sports, men catching feelings with Marion Remiers (Part I)

00:00:00: Also, there's another data.

00:00:02: Ninety-five percent of men don't know as much about sports... ...as they say that do They don't knows crap Okay?

00:00:12: So yeah I'm gonna be bitchy about this!

00:00:18: They believe that they are born with knowing sports under DNA and have no idea.

00:00:50: mess.

00:00:50: A podcast that sits with fire feminists from across the world to do a post-match debrief about the fact, The World is hot trash right now!

00:01:07: So once again, I'm using my platform for my passions.

00:01:22: Okay but speaking of passion i'm sitting down with this dope ass cluster with Marion Rymus.

00:01:29: Marion is not only amazing but also a Mexican sports journalist broadcaster author and cultural voice.

00:01:38: Her work has shifted up the sports landscape and redefined what sports media looks like, sounds like...and stands for in Latin America.

00:01:47: Because she is a badass!

00:01:49: She's made history as the

00:01:51: first

00:01:52: woman to commentate a UEFA Champions League final And become the first Mexican women to be nominated For A Sports Emmy Award.

00:02:01: Did you know that there was The Sports Emmy?

00:02:03: I did not know that.

00:02:04: You learn new things every day, but anyway she also received the Royal Spanish Football and Lava Impact Award and right now hosts Cancha completa con Marion Reimers!

00:02:18: The first sports program in Mexico led by a woman... She Also, because the list continues.

00:02:26: Serves as a UN Goodwill Ambassador in Mexico and has thrown together some wisdom for The New York Times.

00:02:32: She's so much ranged that she is also president of Somos Versus A non-profit dedicated to fighting gender discrimination In sports journalism And wrote a book called Juega Comonina Which translates into English To play like girl.

00:02:50: Also, she's hard as hell like yo.

00:02:51: She fuego or she fire though But it's fine.

00:02:54: write that down.

00:02:56: I know I said this in a previous podcast but guys interview your crushes.

00:02:59: sometimes It just is a good time because we're here for a good Time not a long time.

00:03:04: the first time I liked met Marion.

00:03:06: I was like sorry what?

00:03:10: Why do you look like that?

00:03:11: That is fine, but because I am the ultimate professional and i'm Here For The Community I got them to come on the podcast instead of being messy and here we are.

00:03:22: She dropped me such wisdom, but how does she get so much wisdom?

00:03:28: Let's take it back to her origin

00:03:30: story.".

00:03:31: So um...I mean i got into sports because uh..i have- I am very thankful And I'm very privileged To Have a family that pushed for Me to be in Sports Very active almost hyperactive child.

00:03:50: So I think my poor mother didn't know what to do with me.

00:03:53: She just said, okay Let's get her running so she tires out and we can get her too bad early.

00:04:00: But it was almost a requirement at home for Me in my younger system My sister is ten years younger.

00:04:08: For us to do sports like It was you have to have one activity Whatever you want.

00:04:15: You can do whatever you want, but you have to do one activity a week whether it's swimming tennis Football or soccer however?

00:04:23: You wanna call it basketball what ever you want But you need to practice sports.

00:04:28: and also.

00:04:30: I went to a German school And as you know part of the German culture in my family is also German.

00:04:38: It's very much Sports-oriented.

00:04:41: so My mother growing up as a post-war child was misdiagnosed with the heart condition.

00:04:50: So they never allowed her to play sports, and I believe she wanted for us to have what she never could.

00:04:58: so when she was forty and my sister was born She went to check our heart condition again And they said he was misdagnosed!

00:05:06: So she picked up a racket...she started playing tennis And she has been playing tennis for the past thirty-one years.

00:05:16: She's an amazing tennis player and I believe growing up seeing that, having a forty year old woman which is how old i am today... ...and feel incredibly young.

00:05:28: but picking of a racket saying they told me never could do this well now im going to make it up for lost time was such great example.

00:05:38: So thats all.

00:05:39: i got into sports And I practice sports throughout my entire life.

00:05:43: I still do.

00:05:45: Life is full of ups and downs because much as life can lovingly stroke you on the face, it can also spank you and bring some real character development moments.

00:05:55: What's that phrase?

00:05:56: You Can't Make Diamonds Without A Little Pressure?

00:05:59: Marianne Is An Absolute Gem A Diamond But It Took Some Deep Moments To Get Her Where She Is

00:06:09: and sports broadcasting was a completely different thing.

00:06:15: I had very difficult episode of homophobic rejection at home, at the time And i was looking for work because it was stunning and started to live on my own so needed an income.

00:06:36: hard car crash, we're almost died.

00:06:39: So I needed to make money and they said okay uh i'm gonna start looking for a job And the friend of mine helped me help me out.

00:06:48: so I started working as an assistant in TV network For Fox Sports and...I had no clue about sports competitions.

00:07:01: I had no idea all the statistics, data and history of The Mexican League or what not...I knew the rules to the sport because i practiced them but didn't know.

00:07:12: like you know starting eleven for the historic whatever in nineteen seventy four Netherlands team Van Hanneken Nesken Reisbergen Kruijff has come very deep indeed.

00:07:27: he's a last player on the Dutch side Uh, but I started learning and I started rising through the ranks.

00:07:33: And then I went in live than Argentina for two years.

00:07:38: I did my master's degree there and a work they're for Fox Sports an-an-and it was also doing their masters at uh newspaper An.

00:07:48: that's what sort of clicked.

00:07:50: you know Tiff like i said?

00:07:52: I believe this is big Trojan horse goes beyond field and I have been doing that for the past twenty years

00:08:06: now.

00:08:29: You

00:08:29: can't

00:08:30: actually

00:08:30: spot random commentators in the stands no matter how close your friend stands to the TV.

00:08:37: Like, you know who are drinking wine?

00:08:41: Can we see where she is?

00:08:42: No!

00:08:42: We couldn't.

00:08:43: but anyway... You know that this podcast is a safe space and because I'd be saying random stuff, i actually admitted to Marianne how I am so socialized.

00:08:51: To believe sports are for men slash masculinity That I outsourced all of my engagement with sports through my crushes Like cool!

00:09:00: I may kind like sport but it's kinda harder to like sports.

00:09:03: THROUGH YOU Giggle giggle pushes hair behind the ear.

00:09:08: Anyway I cannot even tell you how many sports fixtures i have watched because someone i am sleeping with slash about to sleep is watching them, right?

00:09:17: So there was the fling that watched f-one.

00:09:20: There was the ex mess of a bay like oh it's just...that relationship was a lot.

00:09:25: but then there was The Ex Mess Of A Bay who used to wake up at two AM

00:09:29: To catch

00:09:29: basketball live and we're not going to mention the multitude of football matches buddies, okay?

00:09:37: I am basically ESPN for the streets and the sheets.

00:09:41: Look i'm not sure if that metaphor works but you get what im trying to say Now.

00:09:45: now Im like girl.

00:09:47: If u wanted to watch F-One just watch f one.

00:09:49: Watch the documentary its ok dont be

00:09:51: shy

00:09:52: gosh.

00:09:52: Anyway!

00:09:53: Im NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO IS NONSENSE IN MY THINKING.

00:09:56: On the internet.

00:09:57: some footballer used his data His whole thumbs his phone To put up a post saying And i quote

00:10:05: girls

00:10:06: The World Cup is finished.

00:10:07: Now you can stop acting like you understand football.

00:10:11: Beyoncé's internet was not having it, the pylon was swift and furious.

00:10:18: Homeboy even had to delete that post.

00:10:21: but sports are genderless And It Is For Everyone!

00:10:24: It is an expansive universe and there so many roots to knowing sports Like look just jump on But There Are So Many Ways That It Remains a boys club.

00:10:39: I love your expression because i would baptize this as the international boy's club, i believe that there is no uh...i mean maybe they're bigger but..there is not a bigger public boys club space in the international sphere of sports.

00:11:00: it's an universal language and men tend to believe universally own sports.

00:11:10: sport is a human activity and as such it is subject to interpretation into change.

00:11:16: And I also wanna tell you don't ever let anyone know nothing about sports because, What does it mean to know about sports?

00:11:27: Does it mean, you know the rules.

00:11:29: Does this mean that you know statistics.

00:11:31: Does it means tactics.

00:11:33: Does fashion.

00:11:35: Does politics or intersection of all above?

00:11:40: and who cares?

00:11:42: let people enjoy things like.

00:11:44: there seems to be these thing where men act as if they had uh membership rewards card where they tell you if you can enter the club or not depending on a trivia.

00:11:59: On, You know?

00:12:00: You knowing about sports and that also happens to women in music like you cannot wear a Metallica t-shirt without men asking you who produced their whatever album it's like.

00:12:11: I don't care Mike let just people enjoy things Robert fuck off i mean We need also to emancipate ourselves in terms of us understanding that joy does not have a membership card, like issued by the Men's Club.

00:12:42: Like the broadest Data and understanding of everything.

00:12:54: You're just supposed to enjoy it.

00:12:56: So please you And all of the women listening to us don't ever an even men, you know Men of the LGBTQ community which have been ostracized from sports.

00:13:07: Don't ever let anyone tell you?

00:13:09: You don't know about sports.

00:13:10: everyone knows something about sport.

00:13:14: We do all know something about sports.

00:13:16: For me personally, the politics of colonization and The World Cup had me in a chokehold.

00:13:21: knowing that European teams were basically made up predominantly Of the same African slash brown folks.

00:13:28: That they're always like oh close our borders was so upset.

00:13:31: you here.

00:13:32: Would you be at the world cup if these people weren't not here?

00:13:35: No You would not.

00:13:36: So my friend had a slightly different take.

00:13:39: being like you know kind of like a finance bro She was like into the economics of it and the messiness of FIFA.

00:13:46: My mother was obsessed with all these people who were like so happy their parents are there, then that one story where a guy couldn't get his mom to come in time

00:13:55: she said we should have done

00:13:57: those internet money raisers!

00:14:04: So sports can very much be a lens through which you view the world not just for testing if you understand the offside rule.

00:14:16: Oh my god, the offside rule.

00:14:19: I mean that's peanuts.

00:14:21: you know how to interpret The world.

00:14:23: You don't understand the world?

00:14:25: The outside rule doesn't matter.

00:14:28: What matters is the big scale of things.

00:14:30: house sports are Intertwined with other aspects over culture.

00:14:35: and i'm gonna give you something else That I learned so many years ago And it's a phrase like I use A lot in Mexico which Is We are all ignorant.

00:14:48: we just don't ignore the same things.

00:14:53: People love being gatekeepers like you're online and people are posting fits without tagging the designer Holidays sands location meals Without a restaurant.

00:15:03: Like come on my guys let people have nice things.

00:15:07: Also, do not shame people for not knowing about things.

00:15:10: Marianne encourages us to rather than be gatekeepers Allow people to approach things with an open and inquisitive mind.

00:15:18: You'll get more friends that way.

00:15:21: How can you just say, oh?

00:15:23: You know nothing about this.

00:15:24: Well, you don't think about it either.

00:15:26: I mean I know nothing About sports and i've been working in like In this industry for the past twenty years.

00:15:32: I might Know a bit more than other people because I get paid to know that but That doesn't mean they know everything.

00:15:38: so why don't we Just become A little bit more humble And allow For others To enter This beautiful spectrum Which has given us So much joy?

00:15:48: Seriously Community is built by people coming together and learning, but men do not want to share sports.

00:15:54: Running around this earth like it's their God-given right acting like pee wasn't spanking all of us.

00:16:00: at eight a.m on our Wednesday morning out in the cold we all suffered through cross country.

00:16:06: Martin I'm gonna need you to like calm All the way down.

00:16:10: i just am going to need You take five seats.

00:16:13: The idea Of Men Feeling Like They Own Sports Is Nothing New.

00:16:18: Historically we've seen men wake up and go absolutely nuts at the idea of women playing sports.

00:16:25: Women were banned from the OG Olympics, you know the Greek ones back in the day?

00:16:29: And could only participate in their herter games every four years on honor of Goddess Zeus's wife or whatever.

00:16:37: At some point FIFA woke-up and banned women from football.

00:16:40: Multiple Football Federations did this but that is a story for the next podcast episode.

00:16:46: Make sure you tune in for that and we all know, The famous image of the nineteen sixty-seven Boston marathon where the race official Jack Semple

00:16:56: physically

00:16:56: attacked and tried to pull Catherine Switzer off the course after realizing she was a woman.

00:17:02: he was like what not on my watch Like, men been trying it.

00:17:08: Another story I found out was women were banned from baseball because a sixteen-year old girl struck out Babe Ruth and he caught such feelings!

00:17:21: He went to the guy who ran baseball... ...and he's like we're not doing this.

00:17:25: you gotta get the honeys outta here.

00:17:27: And they were banned form baseball until goodness knows when so had set up their own leagues.

00:17:32: It is only now an official Baseball League for Women has started.

00:17:36: So look, men been trying it and not only on the field but off-it too!

00:17:43: Only six percent of sports science focuses on women And according to one piece of research Women remain underrepresented both as research subjects AND as academic leaders.

00:17:59: The thing is that Men believe they are taught that this space is their ownership.

00:18:07: And why is it like this?

00:18:09: Well, It gives them security... ...it allows to feel they have what we call a safe space whether its'a safe or not and I'm going trynna be compassionate about this.

00:18:21: now all of those Eric's and Mike's and Joshes and Rogers & Roberts who come and tell you nothing about sports and why don't your girls go shopping?

00:18:31: blah blah.

00:18:33: i'm trying to be compassionate about this because I do think that sports is a realm.

00:18:38: it's space its territory.

00:18:41: Where men are allowed, feel and show their feelings in one of the very few spaces where they can show true emotion there allow to cry they're allowed to show frustration.

00:18:59: they're not too sure.

00:19:06: One of the

00:19:29: big chats I've seen centers on discourse that men are not taught how to be meant.

00:19:33: Okay, hear me out They are taught instead how to NOT be women, which when you think about it leaves a very narrow margin for error because of HOW EXPANSIVE WOMEN ARE.

00:19:44: Men have very few spaces where they feel that can exist in the fullness or human experience as all things except anger and emotions are BAD.

00:19:55: Human connection?

00:19:56: Bad.

00:19:57: Feeling empathy ensuring any form of vulnerability?

00:19:59: Bad!

00:20:00: Physical touch?

00:20:01: Bad.

00:20:02: Then here comes sports.

00:20:04: We have butt slaps and hugs, tears in triumph, camaraderie & a reason to see the boys every weekend without it being sus.

00:20:13: Are we still using suss?

00:20:14: You know what?

00:20:15: whatever I like it lock-in.

00:20:17: In one article The Pee Says But then it's relegated only to those spaces and when it enters the real world, It has no place to go.

00:20:38: The uptick in domestic violence during sporting events like football is a huge marker of that!

00:20:50: This is because once these emotions come, the match's over and now all those emotions fueled by adrenaline and liquor have nowhere to go and bubble into one thing they know how-to be.

00:21:03: Anger & physical violence.

00:21:12: They're afraid they are going to lose their spot, where they can kiss each other on the mouth.

00:21:17: Where they can tap each other in the bottom... ...where they can hug and shower together or cry….

00:21:23: …where they show a whole spectrum of emotion that is not allowed to be shown every day!

00:21:34: The fact that sports must hold this great weight of men's emotions is less about keeping women out and more about figuring ways to expand the spaces, where the fullness of human emotional experience can be

00:21:50: felt.

00:21:51: This isn't my personal business.

00:21:53: My father keeps telling me to save a boy child but like I have told him.

00:22:01: But for those of you who do the work with men and boys, making the container in which they hold their emotions bigger in this society will go a long way to solving a lot of our issues.

00:22:12: This is not me telling you how to do your jobs!

00:22:14: You probably all know about it already so I'm gonna stay on my lane because like i said... My hands are full.

00:22:20: Keeping women out of sports however is NOT the answer, Tim.

00:22:24: Just find a way to hug your boys and tell them you love them!

00:22:28: And just leave women's basketball... ...and other sports out of

00:22:32: it.".

00:22:35: I do believe that men feel threatened because they haven't found other spaces for them to express this.

00:22:43: we haven't fought against society who villainizes these.

00:22:47: so whose gonna be public enemy number one?

00:22:50: Women were trying get into sports When I started out, there were so few of us like just about four or five women in Mexico.

00:23:02: We're doing what i was doing now we have a broader spectrum but uh What I worry about is the role and that happens again In The International Boys Club Like this Is Not Exclusive To Mexico.

00:23:15: This Happens In Europe And The US Everywhere And also it's not a competition.

00:23:21: Like I'm tired of people telling me, oh Mexico is such a sexist country.

00:23:25: like what countries?

00:23:27: Not all countries are such sexists.

00:23:29: the world is sexist.

00:23:30: This is not a bingo card where you get to win against each other.

00:23:33: this Is A Very Petty Competition.

00:23:35: Let's Stop It.

00:23:37: But What I Worry About Is We Still Don't Have The How Should i Say This The voice that guides the narrative, you have very few women who are like in charge of a broadcast.

00:24:01: You have women work company and they're doing a fantastic role.

00:24:05: this is not Women's fault This Is?

00:24:09: The result Of the decision of men Who Are In Power.

00:24:14: okay so let's just start Pointing the finger Towards There Not Towards Women.

00:24:20: So In the beginning, it was a rarity because they used to tell me oh wow like you're not only looks that You could actually know about sports.

00:24:32: Like if I don't know us If I was from another planet, you know.

00:24:37: And in the beginning i mean That's very nice for your ego.

00:24:43: But after awhile you start to understand that Compliment him complimenting Me quote unquote by undermining another woman is not a compliment.

00:24:57: We're not fighting against each other, I've had to go against all kinds of things.

00:25:04: and what worries me most is there's like this kind of self-censorship.

00:25:09: And you can also see that in women sports because it has been so difficult for us To get to this point That once your'e here You don't want challenge the establishment.

00:25:20: And what I have done is, I've challenged the establishment permanently.

00:25:42: You know, like circling back to what we were mentioning in the beginning.

00:25:50: What is sports?

00:25:51: Well if you saw The Recent World Cup... ...you can understand that sports and politics have always been intertwined.

00:25:58: Don't tell me as you tell athletes stick-to-kicking a ball or stick to dribbling of all.

00:26:05: There's an absolute lie.

00:26:08: I do think That We Need To Learn To Inhabit Uncomfortableness.

00:26:15: I don't know if that's a term, but you know?

00:26:18: Like in Spanish, habitar la incomodidad.

00:26:22: We need to learn how to be uncomfortable with things.

00:26:24: we live in a society where are no longer pushed towards being uncomfortable.

00:26:35: And on that note, we end this episode because next week We are diving deeper into the politics of sports and how people Are really taking women's sports for a joke sometimes.

00:27:03: We chat about the body as a battleground and how FIFA and friends are really walking away from cash money due to misogyny.

00:27:12: It's like pick-a struggle!

00:27:14: Are you capitalist or sexist?

00:27:16: Let's do one of the other guys, let's get it together.

00:27:20: But till next episode You must remember that there things to read in show notes because again we gotta keep right and cognitively

00:27:29: tight.

00:27:32: As you can tell, I am still kicking it with the Global Unit for Feminism and Gender Democracy of The Heinrich Ball Foundation that is still hosting this podcast.

00:27:42: We are still squad guys we're still inside!

00:27:45: And my mix and mastering team and magicians Rey & Sheldon and my new favorite Cavullu Cuz answers my emails also makes jokes on the email chain.

00:27:57: I love a person who makes jokes in the e-mail chain y'all.

00:28:00: Thank you so much for that post apocalyptic production, thank You Also For Cam That's My Wife Smith for being A beautiful Being Who Keeps My Mind Right and Tight Through Research.

00:28:13: Tell The Next Episode.

00:28:14: Go Outside And Touch Grass.

00:28:16: Do One Of Those Fun Runs Where They Give You Wine Instead of Water Or do Naked Yoga On Your Balcony Cuz.

00:28:22: Damn It You pay rent.

00:28:25: Okay, you pay rent and it is all chaos anyway because this Is not the apocalypse we signed up for.